From The Recovery Process www.therecoveryprocess.com
The Truth about Relationships
Part 1 of 2
If you are willing to consider that life is a dream 'going on,' and you are what that is, all the time, with no exceptions, the idea someone exists to have a self looms into view as the parody of all parodies.
As long as we defend the idea the self is real, we are obligated to play the part of someone with some kind of a self, either a 'good' one or a 'bad' one. If you can play with this idea, you will notice that the best defense of the lie the self is real is to invent a less than okay one; one that is damaged, flawed, filled with 'self doubts' and 'self consciousness,' just to name a few maladies that keep the lie in place the self is real.
The best defense for the self is to play the part of a victim because nothing brings more credibility to the lie the self exists than a beleaguered self that is doing its level best to put up with a "very difficult life."
If you read the works of Wei Wu Wei, all eight books, you will discover that this is his message, and his message was derived from a scholarly review of all Buddhist writings since the inception of "Buddhism." What makes his message spectacular is that he goes to the heart of truth, whereas most authors of all persuasions either mince their words, or back off from the telling of truth because it does not comply with our preferred version of reality.
The truth about truth is that it is vastly different from what we want to believe it is, and this means most of us spend most of our time resisting truth because it asks us to consider the outrageous thought that we have never been right about anything, not because we are "wrong" but because truth reveals the concept of 'right' and 'wrong' is bogus in the absence of anyone to be the one or the other.
Wei Wu Wei's interpretation of Buddhism presents the following picture: a dream is 'going on' featuring 'everything,' just the way it manifests, including 'the dreamers,' that's us, who mostly show up to 1) defend the lie the self is real in order to defend the lie 2) this is not a dream in order to 3) defend the lie we are 'the people' we insist we are. What this means, flat out, is that the dream includes 'everything' and zooms in on what the dreamer's are doing in the dream to play a game in which they use time to 1) pretend they forgot there are no people, so they can 2) play the part of people believably in this dream.
At first blush, this view of reality sounds crazy, but do we dismiss it as ridiculous because it is crazy, or is it because it is our nature in this dream to pretend we forgot the truth so we can use time to play the part of 'real people.' If it is true, then this dream features everything 'the dreamers' do in this dream to defend the lie 'everything' is real, and not content in a dream, especially, and in particular, 'the dreamers.' If this is true, then every minute of every day in the dream reveals where 'the dreamers' are with the truth this is a dream and they are dreamers using time to impersonate people.
What makes his message upsetting for 'the dreamers' in this dream is that nothing 'we' do in this dream will work to cancel who 'we' are, what 'this' is and what 'we' are doing in the dream. If you take this to the end of the road, it takes us to a hard and fast rule: "the option to be a person does not exist." The more you play with this concept, the more obvious it becomes that almost every dreamer in this dream uses time to wage war against truth in order to defend the fiction the self belongs to real people.
If everything is content in a dream, and that's the truth, then the truth is what 'we' are. Nothing 'we' do in the dream will work to prove 'we' are separate from the truth. If the dreamer owns the truth, how can it use time to pretend to be something independent from the truth? No dreamer in this dream can play "The Personhood Game" convincingly unless it creates the fiction called "duality," or the lie that truth is divisible into separate, unrelated objects.
If duality is a trick the dreamers require to play this game, the personhood parody rests on very shaky ground. Everything the dreamers do in this dream hinges on the lie duality is real. The game begins with a lie which the dreamers must pretend they forgot so they can go on to invent the self in order to play the part of 'real people' in this dream.
What is mind blowing about this view of reality is that it states that the dream is the context for the whole drama. In this light, "reality" features the sum of what 'the dreamers' do in this dream to pretend they forgot truth so they can use time to pretend to be people, and all of this takes place in the dream which is what 'right now' is. If this is true, then all you have to do is identify what you, as a dreamer, are doing in the dream to maintain the fiction you are the person you insist you are. Moreover, you are never in the presence of people; only dreamers working diligently to preserve the fiction they are people.
What this means, in simple terms, is that "reality" is a charade delivered by 'the dreamers' in this dream and that regardless of what shows up, all of it can only be content in the dream. The dream is always what 'right now' is, and it features all the ways 'the dreamers' defend the fiction they are 'the people' they insist they are in this dream; the one that is in full swing 'right now.' Buddhism teaches us to be present in the present, but this takes us one step further: you are what the present is.
Once you start to play with this view of reality, and you address your resistance to truth, or what could be the truth, you settle into a place in which you watch the dream 'going on' and you cease to pretend anything 'going on' has anything to do with people.
Liberated from the fiction people exist, the drama in the dream becomes increasingly amazing. One thing you notice is that "the shift" from person in reality to dreamer in a dream is that you feel much calmer, since there are no people to be in contest with; more appropriate, since 'reactions' to dreamers posing as people are viewed objectively as slapstick because they are absurd; and more objective because you are watching the dream 'go on' directly, and not through the filter of lies required to defend personhood.
All in all, life in the dream improves because you can be who you are, a dreamer in this dream, instead of who you aren't (a person) and can never be. Posing as a person in a dream feels out of tune with truth. Being a dreamer liberated from the obligation to play the part of a person feels like you have won a giant reprieve; a second chance to recover the truth so you can live with it joyfully, with none of the baggage that goes with the defense of the lie you are a person, and probably, in the name of resistance, a less than okay one. Imagine getting it: there is no one to be any kind of a person, okay or not okay!
This brings us to the whole concept of "relationships." First of all, outside of the fiction called "duality" which is the basic lie the dreamers rely on to pretend they can defect from truth, we are an integral part of what the fundamental relationship is: Mind, or Self, the ultimate subject, or author of the dream we get to show up in. Upstream of duality, we are all "mind stuff." Whatever you are, I am, and vice versa. Even though we use time in this dream to defend the fiction of our imaginary individuality, which captures the essence of what we as dreamers do in this dream, most of us know our defense of duality is bogus. We can feel this background truth in the face of beauty, or when something moves us emotionally collectively, or when we drop our dualistic guard and experience the truth of our inescapable connection.
"The Personhood Game" in this dream comes with rules. First, we must pretend we forgot truth in order to use time to play the part of 'real people.' Secondly, we have all signed some imaginary document to agree not to discuss or reveal the truth that "reality" is a Mind generated fantasy featuring 'the dreamers' and what they do in this dream to ignore the fact nothing 'going on' has ever had anything to do with people. All 'the dreamers' in this dream share this secret; guard this secret and defend this secret, some more than others. This defines how 'the dreamers' use time in the dream to play "The Personhood Game" convincingly.
Since we co-host the agreement to ignore truth, we can not reveal that we use time to wage war against truth and truth alone. Every dreamer in this dream fills time with the way it wages war against truth. This is every dreamer's fingerprint in this dream. Once a dreamer recovers the truth, and breaks clear of its collection of lies, it is free to watch all the ways 'the dreamers' give truth a hard time in order to prolong "The Master Lie," that 'this' is real, and not content in a dream, and that all 'the people' are the people they insist they are.
Now we get to the crux of "the problem." Since we must avoid the truth of what 'our' war is all about, we dismiss it and reinforce "The Master Lie" by pretending people are at cause for all 'the problems' in this world. We hide the real war in order to delay our date with truth by taking it out on one another, as if people exist to be at the center of the war. If we admit we know duality is a hoax, the concept of 'sides' or 'enemies' collapses, along with all forms of conspiracy.
Because 'right now' is only a dream, there is no one to be against any one, so the dreamers in defense of "The Master Lie," wage endless war against one another. This works perfectly to pit one imaginary self against another imaginary self and this fills the dream with enough drama to turn almost any dream into a nightmare. The dream features 'the dreamers' keeping the secret safe by using all forms of duality to prolong the fiction 1) this is not a dream, and 2) all forms of war prove the self is real.
There never was anyone to ever have any kind of a relationship with anyone. Upstream of duality, our 'relationship' is a fixed fact. We are inextricably united and we wage war against this fact because we can't be ONE and be separate selves simultaneously. Truth takes a back seat to the game the dreamers play out in this dream. Truth includes 'the game' we play in the dream, and, since the dreamers' status as a dreamer is fixed, we can 1) use time to play the game to defend "The Master Lie," or 2) we can recover the truth of who we are and let go of who we aren't and can never be.
The statistics about this dream clearly indicate that most dreamers use time to play "The Personhood Game" which emphasizes the defense of the lie the self is real to defend the fiction people exist. History is a record of the vicissitudes of this game; sometimes we move in the direction of truth, that we are one, and that care and respect make perfect sense, but in the main, most dreamers fill time with the defense of the lie the self is real to prolong the fiction the dreamers in this dream are the people they insist they are.
In the pre-self days in the dream, when the dreamer/ infant was content to be one with truth, it enjoyed the only relationship there is or ever will be; the indivisible connection with the infinite Mind, but this stage doesn't last very long. The urge to invent the self to play "The Personhood Game" is compelling; in fact it seems to be mandatory in this dream. A few infants never join the fray: they go with the sense of their oneness regardless of what shows up in the dream. This is the exception because we soon notice that all the dreamers are busy using time to defend the lie the self is real in order to play "The Personhood Game."
Mom is a dreamer in the dream, for example who used early events in the dream to assemble a self in which she used all her time to star as a 'professional martyr' and dad defends the fiction he has a 'weak self' by abusing alcohol to prolong the fiction someone exists to have a self. If he gives up drinking he faces the ugly prospect of owning the truth there is no one to have a self and not even the regular abuse of alcohol will work to cancel that fact. So he drinks every day in defense of the lie the self is real in order to document that he is a real 'lost soul.' There is no real proof that he even likes alcohol, but he is willing to forfeit sobriety in favor of defending the fiction someone exists to have a self.
Continued in Part Two...
The Recovery Process - provides reminders to expand consciousness. This process assists you to shift from who you aren't, often someone who suffers, to who you are; a spiritual being ---free at last to enjoy the agenda- free life.
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